Emotional Intelligence

Leadership Starts with You

Iconic basketball coach John Wooden said, “First be best, then be first.” This line gives the imperative to earn our place as leaders. Some might think leaders are merely appointed, and that appointment is sufficient to claim authority, but understanding leadership as merely positional misses the nature of leadership altogether. More tragically, understanding leadership in this singular way omits the secret to effective leadership. Appointments are meant to reflect a deeper dynamic, an authority not based on position, but integrity.

“First be Best, then be first.” - Coach John Wooden

Integrity Matters

But wait a minute, isn’t integrity just about being reliable and trustworthy? Yes, it is about those things, but in a leadership capacity, these traits translate to reliably embodying the skills, determination, know-how, and vision to reach the goals for the team. It’s about being the type of person your team can trust to take them to where you’re being called upon to go.

And being that person is not just about your team. When you are the best, when you are the person that can reliably take your team to where they need to go in a trustworthy, competent manner, they will respect you. But even more importantly, you will respect yourself, which will mean your manner will be in alignment with your leadership actions. At the end of the day, knowing you have given yourself and others your best helps you earn not just personal confidence but the confidence of those you seek to influence.

It Changes Others

People experience hope and garner inspiration when someone demonstrates how to overcome an obstacle or meet a desired goal. The greatest throughout history is regarded as the greatest because they not only cast a vision, they worked tirelessly to gain the knowledge and pathways to achieving it. They showed people what was truly possible in new and exciting ways. All effective leaders, through their own example, give people hope.

Do you want to reap the benefits of self-leadership for your team? Our weekly Leadership Lessons are a fantastic tool for helping you up your leadership game.

Self-Awareness Equals Better Relationships

Self-Awareness Equals Better Relationships

Self-awareness is the product of intentional self-examination. Sometimes we are surrounded by such noise that it takes an intentional appointment to make room for the stillness needed for contemplation and getting in touch with ourselves. This understanding of our own emotional states, moods, and motivations in turn allows us to better empathize with others, which is a critical leadership quality.

The Power of a Smile: A Secret Ingredient to Employee Engagement

Today, I was asked to sit in on an employee relations situation with a team leader and her employee. When arrived, the angst was high, many emotions and concerns were thrown out at once that I cannot even hear clearly. (thinking to myself, how am I going to be able to help, yikes!) So they took turns to talk and hear the other one with respect (they vowed me with this). My job was to listen, not to "listen to understand" or "listen to solve" BUT LISTEN WITH PRESENCE, trusting the Spirit will show me the next step.

We distilled it down to this very quickly: we needed the employee to stay because production is busy and have high demands to meet in order to serve the customers, not because the team leader was being difficult (she herself has sacrificed much of her family time to serve) so we asked kindly: will you please help out the company, and he said absolutely. Then next up, he has been dealing with a lot in his personal life and therefore admitted he has been daydreaming a bit while he's on the line and could not catch everything. The team leader is extraordinarily accountable and always points out to make sure he is doing his job well. Still, she cares very much about him and admits that he usually does a good job; only recently, there have been more errors. So, we explained that accountability is the form of love; she corrects him because she wants him to succeed, BUT while we are overworked and under pressure, we could still have some fun and lightheartedness, so I challenged the team leader to catch him doing something great every day. Finally, I challenged them to high-five each other every day, and they immediately fist-bumped each other on the spot and smiled. I am so amazed at their receptiveness.

We crave to understand and be understood, and we yearn to care about each other. Humanity is created to love. I don't ever underestimate the power of a touch or the power of a smile. People can hear your smile over the phone, and people can feel your smile down the road and around the corner before they even see you. KEEP SMILING! Lift other's spirits. Sometimes it is not as hard as we make it out to be! :)

-an average gal who gets to work with incredible souls

Be a Superhero. Be a Leader.

Two weeks ago, I had the opportunity to learn from the Cultural Intelligence Center by attending their Cultural Competency Training. The most profound experience for me was an activity where we had to start by describing a significant challenge our world face today and then consider what would happen if we left that challenge as is (not do anything about it). Lastly, we had to consider what would happen if that challenge overcame the world. Once we'd done that, we built a "superhero," equipping that superhero with special powers to overcome that challenge.

Be a Superhero. Be a Leader.

Be a Superhero. Be a Leader.

Our group had decided to make our superhero a powerful fairy (stay with me here). Our fairy has a bag of fairy dust that contains vulnerability, openness, understanding, appreciation, recognition, empathy, humility, and so on (it has everything because our fairy is a superhero).

In a world where we are diverse, be it race, culture, gender, age, education, or knowledge level, etc., what if we focus on being open and understanding from where others are coming? What if we considered the experiences that shape who others are? What would the world look like? Under stress, we tend to default to familiarity, to that comfort zone that makes us feel safe. But this isn't where change happens. To enact change, either in others or ourselves, avoid creating stressful experiences. Be considerate in your words and communication style. Be open, be a good listener, try to understand, be appreciative, and know that each person is valuable. Let that overcome the world instead.